


Still In Love

by emquin



Series: Season 6 Reaction Fics [8]
Category: Glee
Genre: 6.05, Glee - Freeform, M/M, Season 6 Reaction fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-01-31
Updated: 2015-01-31
Packaged: 2018-03-09 19:15:39
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 977
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3261269
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/emquin/pseuds/emquin
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>In which Blaine realizes he's still in love with Kurt. 6.05 reaction fic.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Still In Love

“I’m in love with Kurt.” 

Ms. Ashmore stared at him, and Blaine knew she was waiting for him to continue because throwing a statement like that out there needed to be explained. 

“Sue locked me and Kurt in an elevator. Well, a fake elevator, and told us the only way to leave would be to kiss.”

“Alright,” Ms. Ashmore said, “so it was easy, right, kiss and get out.”

It hadn’t been that easy at all, which in the aftermath Blaine realized it was because he was still in love with Kurt and of course he couldn’t risk kissing Kurt. 

“Of course it wasn’t,” Ms. Ashmore said, “what happened, Blaine?” 

Blaine told her. He told her about how they tried to escape, how he banged on the doors and no one came to rescue them, and how they took turns sleeping just in case the creepy Sue doll returned. He told her about how easy it was to talk to Kurt, and how eventually he had all but forgotten where they were or why. 

“He just kept bringing up the past, we were playing this stupid game about guessing the word written on a piece of paper and it was just so easy, like old times. So I brought up Dave.” 

Blaine covered his face in his hands. He could still remember the hurt look that Kurt had worn then, and how he hadn’t been able to really look at Kurt in that moment, knowing that he’d just taken the ease out of their game with just a mention of a name. 

“Last time you were here, Blaine, you told me that Kurt was moving on. You said he had a date.” 

His name was Walter. Blaine didn’t know who he was or even what he looked like, but he’d gotten a sense from Sue that the man was much older than Kurt. One could never tell with Sue’s exaggeration, but Blaine was almost positive that it wasn’t serious. 

Blaine dropped his hands from his face.

“I wouldn’t call him his boyfriend or anything,” Blaine said. 

Sue had. Kurt hadn’t corrected her. 

“So, what else happened? Why do you think you’re in love with Kurt?” 

Blaine didn’t want to blurt out about how when he’d gotten home he’d just walked into his bathroom and jacked off to thoughts of Kurt. Or how later he’d woken up with a hard on and how he’d only just stopped himself from texting Kurt about it, not even once remembering that he had a boyfriend. 

Instead, Blaine told her, “when we kissed it was like coming home. I’ve been trying to find myself and my home for so long and kissing him, it felt like I was complete once more.” 

He wanted to cry, like he’d done during the first, second, and third session with Ms. Ashmore. It wasn’t fair. Blaine had moved on. He had gotten himself back together and then started to be productive. He had Dalton. He had a new apartment. Hell, he had a boyfriend. One that really cared about him and that Blaine didn’t want to hurt. Still, Blaine knew he had to admit it to himself. How whenever Dave kissed him, Blaine felt nothing. How, the reason he hadn’t slept with Dave wasn’t just that they were taking it easy, but because Blaine – ever since sleeping with Eli – had vowed to never have sex with someone he wasn’t in love with. He didn’t love Dave. Like him, yes, but he couldn’t love him. 

“We’ve discussed before how unhealthy your view of your relationship with Kurt was,” Ms. Ashmore said.

Blaine thought back to the time spent in the elevator, how easy it had been to talk to Kurt once they got over the awkwardness and the anger at being locked in an elevator. Kurt had just been so open and friendly, not holding anything back. He hadn’t even tried to hide his distaste at Blaine bringing up Dave. 

“He’s changed,” Blaine said, “the Kurt in the elevator and the Kurt that broke up with me are completely different people as much as I am different from the Blaine he broke up with.”

Ms. Ashmore nodded. “Alright,” she said, “how is he different?” 

“Well, he didn’t just shut me out. He could have just been cold and aloof and I’ve seen that sometimes when…when Dave and I have run into him. All of his masks, they were gone. He was just Kurt. He was my best friend.”

She smiled. “Okay. Good. So what now?”

Blaine took a deep breath. “I have to break up with Dave.” 

There was no way he could hide it, not now that he was admitting everything to himself. Of course he had never stopped loving Kurt. Of course he wasn’t over Kurt. He could still remember the kiss, how Kurt’s slips had pressed against his just hard enough, the sweep of Kurt’s tongue in his mouth, and how much Blaine had wanted to keep going. To push Kurt against the fake elevator wall and kiss down his jaw to that spot that made Kurt see stars when Blaine sucked on it. Then, the next day, seeing him again in Sue’s office, and hardly being able to keep his hands to himself, palming at his own hardness in his car before driving to his apartment and walking right past Dave into the bathroom to really take care of the problem. 

“You told me when we first met that you never wanted to forgive him,” Ms Ashmore said. 

Blaine shook his head, and tried to will himself to not get hard in the middle of her office. It really had been too long. 

“Well,” she said, “if you remember I told you it wasn’t the approach to take. You’ve come a long way, Blaine.” 

He smiled at her and she grinned back.


End file.
